I have just heard the news that my nephew was in a horrible car accident.  The car was going very fast, around a sharp corner.  The driver lost control and my nephew was thrown out the passenger-side window, several feet from the car.

The good news:  he’s alive and able to walk.

The bad news:  he has suffered serious brain injury and is recovering in hospital.

By the grace of God (and his Guardian angel) he is alive and not a quadriplegic.  Really.

The other person in the car had their seatbelt on and suffered a minor concussion.

Over the course of the last few days, I have wept for my nephew and how this injury and life-altering experience may affect him in the days, weeks, months and years to come.  And my heart  has gone out to his wife and young children.  She is a strong woman, who is handling all this right now with a strength and spirit that is amazing, but the time will come when all that has happened will really hit her.

I am thankful to the doctors and emergency teams that helped him and I am thankful for his guardian angel.  When he’s feeling better, I’d like to smack him (though not on the head) for not wearing his seatbelt.  This was a close-call.

* Please * buckle-up:  yourself and your children.  Do it all the time.  Do it properly.  Do it today.

“Unbelted occupants of a motor vehicle can, in essence, become projectiles in a collision, seriously injuring themselves and others. In almost 60% of all car accident fatalities, the victim was not wearing a seat belt” (  Source ).

If this isn’t enough, here is some additional information:

Statistics - U.S.

My 9-year old son is now playing competitive MD level hockey (yes, I still have mixed feelings about this - but that’s for another post / another day).

In town, since they started the season they are undefeated!  Wow.  That’s super-awesome …

However, they go to an away-tournament over the holidays and it all comes crashing down.  They go from undefeated to badly-defeated.  And, my son is one of the two goalies on this team.  (yikes to be the mom-of-the-goalie … again - another post / another day

I went into the dressing room after the game.  I’m thinking I’ll hug him and tell him all kids of wonderful mother-sentiments … he takes one look at me and says “I don’t want you in here.”

Hmmm … ok … ummm … that’s not what I was expecting at all.  So, in the time it takes me to

I can remember as a teenager, I made up long (long) lists of resolutions - things that I was going to do better in the coming year.

Then I went through a period of:  no resolutions.  Just live life.

Now I believe that a new year is definitely a chance to reflect on a few things:

• what’s working well
• what’s not working well (and may need some tweaking) and - most importantly -
• what am I thankful for

I typically pause at least daily, to be thankful for the many gifts in my life - not the least of which, of course, are my hubby, kids and the fact that I live in Canada (yes, I think this is a big one).

I actually made a resolution of sorts, last fall which is really *really* working for me.  I hug my kids all the time (and smooch their beautiful faces too) but I decided that when I hug them, I will no longer “let go” first.  You would be shockingly surprised at how long people will hug, if you don’t break-it-off first.

Try it out.  See if that’s working for you.  I bet it will.  And you’ll be happy you did.

If you’ve been reading this blog for a while, you’ll know that we’re big on snuggling in our house and that bedtime is quite ritualistic for the boys:  pj’s, brush teeth, story, lights out, prayers, song (or 2) and a snug.  Then sleepy-time.  I love this time of the day - even though it’s hectic - because there is time to connect with each kid, one-on-one.  And you never know what they might have to share.

Last night, my 4 -year old, hair-twirling, snuggler wrapped his little arms around me and kissed me on my upper arm (I had a t-shirt on).  He paused, kissed my upper arm again and said “Momma - is that what chubby’s called?”  pointing to my upper arm.

So, wanting to portray a positive body image, and self-identifying that - even though I carry a 20+lb toddler around and have been known to carry my 4-year old at (rare) times - does not give me pipes like Madonna’s, I smiled … and said to him “no, honey, that’s not chubby.  That’s mommy’s muscle on my arm called a bicep”.

He paused to give this answer thought for a minute.  Then my sweet boy leaned over and kissed my upper arm again … and said:

“Nope, I tink that’s chubby”.

A recent study, highlighted today, shows that the majority of facepaints on the market contain above acceptable levels of lead as well as other metals that are not great for your kid’s skin.  Even those that were marked as being “hyper allergenic” were not.

What does this mean?  A doctor went on to say that for once a year, for trick-or-treating, it’s likely not a big risk for your kids.  However, if you’re taking a puritan approach to chemicals then you may want to avoid the dollar-store face paint this year.

Believe it or not, and depending upon what you’re painting on your wee-one’s face, I’ve had great success with a set of brushes and my make up.  Good for making whiskers on a lion and also worked to make my eldest look even scarier.  If you want a darker effect, wet the brush first in water and then into the make up pot.

Happy Halloween!

We recently had friends over for dinner, and I made my date squares.  They loved them - and asked for the recipe (which I’m always happy to pass on).  They’re so yummy - I thought I ‘d send it out to all of you as well.

They take about 10 minutes to make, and then bake - and are crazy easy to make.  The trick to mine is LOTS of dates.

Joy’s Date Squares

1997 (the first time I ever made them — yes, I keep track of this stuff).

1. Take a large container of dates, put them in a large pot, with enough water to *almost* cover them
2. Put the pot to boil
3. Once boiled, stir occasionally for 10 minutes (this softens them)
4. Remove from heat and cool
5. Once cool’ish, use a blender to blend them up, so they’re smoother

Meanwhile - make the topping and base:

* you can adjust the amount you make depending upon the size of the pan you have.  You can play around with it a bit, but generally:

1. 1/2 cup of margarine or butter
2. 1 cup of large flake (not instant) oatmeal
3. 1 cup of flour
4. 3/4 cup of brown sugar
5. You can add cinnamon / ginger / nutmeg, if you like that - I don’t because the kids don’t like these spices at all
6. Blend together.
7. Use 1/2 of mixture for the bottom of the pan, pressing it down into the pan firmly
8. Put the date mixture on top
9. Use the remaining oatmeal mixture and kind of “crumble” it over the top (looks nicer) and then lightly press it all down with your hand.

Bake at 350 degrees for 25-30 minutes (not too long or the bottom with burn - yuck).

Cool and eat and eat and eat … I like them for breakfast. I make them for my friend’s Dad – and she thinks he eats them for breakfast, lunch and supper!

And – as an added benefit – they’re very good for the * constitution *

To Immunize or not … for H1N1.

I believe in getting immunizations for the BIG ones, but I don’t believe in the flu shot, we’ll take Chicken Pox when it comes AND I have no intention of getting the vaccination for H1N1.

We eat whole foods that are mostly organic.  We take our vitamins (especially the C in winter). We wash our hands.  A lot.  Especially with the heightened awareness of H1N1.

Imagine how glad I was to receive these articles sent to me, outlining that you can protect yourself and your family as effectively (or moreso) with Vitamin D.  Now - I’m not a doctor or a health professional of any kind.  But (for those who know me - you know … ) I do like to pass on information and *sometimes* give advice.

So - here goes:

Increasing your daily intake of Vitamin D (and still eating good foods, and your other regular vitamins) will exponentially strengthen your system against H1N1.  Yes.  Really.

” … people with the worst vitamin D deficiency were … more likely to suffer respiratory infections {like H1N1} than those with sufficient levels, according to the research in this week’s Archives of Internal Medicine…”

You can get Vitamin D from some foods - but it’s virtually impossible to get enough of this powerful vitamin to protect you and your family this cold season.

The sun also gives you Vitamin D - but one of the disadvantages of living in Canada is that we do not get enough Vitamin D, year-round, from the sun, to do the job.

What to do?  Take it orally.  It’s quick.  It’s easy.  Your kids will take it.  It has the added benefit of helping you build stronger bones.  Check it out today at your local health food store and read up online and get informed!~

Vitamins vs. Vaccine for Swine Flu

Canadian Rearch on Vitamin D and H1N1

Vitamins to avoid Swine Flu

H1N1 - Vitamin D Council Report

Brad Pitt was once quoted as saying: “Breakfast is my favourite time of day.  With all 6 kids at the table and everyone talking at once, it’s chaotic.  I like to just sit back and enjoy the chaos”.

Well - it turns out that Brad and Angelina likely have a good thing going there, with a family that eats together.

Maybe you would like to see a return to the “good old days”?  A simpler time.  A time without kids being programmed every single waking minute of their little lives.  A time when food was prepared … cooked even … in something other than the microwave or a takeout container.

Well, believe it or not, a recent study has shown that a return to these simpler times my not only boost your child’s brain development, but help them make smart choices about drugs, alcohol and smoking.  Impossible!! you say?  Not … says I (and an article in the Globe & Mail).

The number one thing that you can do to help your kids grow into self-assured, balanced, smart youth is to eat supper together.  Yes.  Really.  It’s that simple.

“Eating as a family can protect children from all sorts of harm, experts say the bonding and connectedness that comes with regular family meals may positively influence the brain development of kids”.

When was the last time your family ate together?  This is really important folks.  And something that requires a bit of organizing (gotta love that crock pot), commitment, and cooperation - but it IS possible.  One of our boys has now started competitive hockey [yes, I caved.  and yes, he made the team - but that's a blog for another day].  Last week he was out the door for hockey over our regular supper hour, SO, we ate supper as a family at 4:30.  Impossible?  No.  Worth it?  Definitely.

Sure our kids are getting tonnes of developmental opportunities to learn every sport known to humankind AND art classes AND music and, and, and … but what they really need is THEIR FAMILY.  My sister-in-law once told me that as long as you keep looking your kids in the eye when they talk to you, you’ll always know where they’re at (physically and psychologically).

Ok -maybe it can’t be every single night, but let’s commit to our future generation of parents, leaders, business people, caregivers … who are our KIDS TODAY - have supper together more often in the week, than not.  It’s been proven.  Everyone will benefit for it and in a big way.  They are worth it.

Chewing Over the Benefits of a Family Meal - Globe & Mail article

As we come into the Fall Season and September (September!!??) I am shocked at how fast time is going by.  I can remember in Mr. Helseth’s class in grade 6, how it felt as if it would take forever for the time to pass from 3:00 - 3:15 … and now, I blink and it’s not July - it’s September!

So, back to school it is.  A time of year with such promise - new teachers, new grade.  My middle boy starts school - the beginning of his academic career that will likely span at leas 18 years! (yikes).  He is bright and eager and ready to learn.  We do the best we can with matchmaking with our kids’ teachers and are involved with the school to help as much as we can.

My husband and I drop him off at his little JK class, video camera in hand and a tear in my eye (ok - like a few tears in my eyes).  It’s hard to believe this sweet little boy is big enough to go to school - BUT - he is.  And, like every little boy, so very attached to his mom, our parting at this monumental stage of his life was … well … easy.   He basically rolled his eyes at me with a soft smile (at my unshed tears welling up in my eye).  Gave me a big hug and was off, without scarcely a glance back.

He is so ready to be in school, make new friends, and discover new challenges.  I guess, as his mom, I have a little catching up to do - but I’ll get there - eventually.

As my hubby and I walk back and reminisce about the day he was born and all his mini-life major milestones, we are astonished at how fast this has all happened.  And yet, I know, we will blink and it will be Christmas.  The older we get, the faster it goes.

Only 104 more shopping days til Christmas (just in case you’re keeping track - you need to get busy!)

Have I mentioned lately that we live in a lovely neighbourhood?  Great neighbours.  Helpful.  Supportive.  We are even blessed enough to live literally around the corner from my best friend.

When I had my third baby - the neighbour-women got busy:  cooking, baking and walking - all in the effort of making sure that my family ate and that I had a break as they took one or more kids out of the house for some fresh air and exercise.

My one girlfriend  in particular is sensitive to the weight and responsibility of raising three boys.  Well - she’s the mother of three boys herself (though her boys aren’t tiny anymore.  They are a strapping and handsome bunch at 11.5, 15 and 17 years old).  She really understands the challenges of getting three children under the age of 8 to bed in an evening - by yourself (my hubby was at work).  She’s walked that mile in my shoes.  She is the source of parenting advice and one that I have listened to through all the years we’ve been friends.

However.

I now have a piece of advice to share with this girlfriend of mine — and to all those other well-meaning friends:  take heed to what I am about to say (with a smile on my face and just a smidge of an “I told you so” tone of voice) …

LET SLEEPING BABIES LIE … in their cribs … on their own … in the dark … when they are sleeping.

I know that when you pop over, it would be oh-so-nice to have that sweet-smelling baby snuggle.  Feel those chubby little arms around your neck.  All that good stuff - yes, I get it.  But - when the mommy says:  he’s sleeping … he’s sleeping!

Funny story because my girlfriend (oh - let’s for the sake of this story call her The Godmommy) … The Godmommy popped by for a visit, mere minutes after putting not one BUT three of my children to bed, by myself (no small feat - let me tell you!).  The Godmommy asked, with those big blue eyes and that sad, pouty face … “Oh really?  Can I just pop up and say goodnight?”

Well - let me take you to the Coles Notes ending … baby woke up to have a lovely snug with his Godmommy … baby did not go back to sleep.  Party baby fussed and fussed until The Godmommy had to go up and release baby from the confines of his terrible crib AND … party baby was up until 10:00 PM!  (yes, 10 PM). Well intentioned - yes.  But I can definitely milk this one for a very (very) long time

So, I can finally share some parenting advice with my dear and experienced friend and mother of three boys:  (please) Let Sleeping Babies Lie!